


Home

by Warlock_Nerd



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec has PTSD, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Bottom Magnus Bane, Disability, Eventual Smut, Ex-military Alec Lightwood, Fluff and Smut, Love, M/M, Making Love, Physical Disability, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Smut, Top Alec, Top Alec Lightwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-20
Updated: 2019-02-20
Packaged: 2019-11-01 11:10:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17866166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Warlock_Nerd/pseuds/Warlock_Nerd
Summary: Ex-Military Alec Lightwood has trouble showing Magnus his body after he is injured in combat.Magnus shows him how much he loves him no matter how many scars.





	Home

Alec was in the kitchen chopping some kind of root vegetable. He smiled back at Magnus as he entered.    
Alec walked over to greet his fiance. The taller man wore sneakers even in the house to hide the fact that he had a prosthetic leg. (It was pretty obvious to anyone with eyes.) The way his knee hardly bent, the way his foot hit the floor as if being dragged. With each step his hips struggled ever so slightly to maintain balance.    
Part of Magnus was resentful that his lover would not even be comfortable enough around Magnus while having his prosthetic on show. Magnus could feel his leg when they had sex. Turning off the lights doesn't change that fact that plastic does not have the same feel as human flesh but Alec refused to let Magnus see it. Magnus wanted so badly for Alec to be able to trust him. But he couldn't force the subject. Alec would just shut down- once a soldier always a soldier. He met Magnus when he was home after his first tour in Iraq. They fell in love, got engaged... but Alec had to go back to Iraq to finish his tour. He got injured and was sent home with one leg. Now, Alec had trouble with his leg and was a bit insecure about it. He also struggled with PTSD. The nightmares were proof of that.    
  


"Hello, Alexander," Magnus greeted, putting his arms around his soldier's neck, “Oh, you will never believe who I ran into- Isabelle."   
"Isabelle? My sister! How is she?"   
"I got a call and went in the ambulance.” Magnus was a paramedic, usually he’d work with Cataina- his best friend, “Izzy pulled a baby out of a burning car. You should have been there! Your sister was such a bad-ass. We were waiting on the fire department to, you know, actually put out the fire. The parents had a few bumps and bruises. Mother had a concussion... But Isabelle took an rescue hammer from her purse and without any hesitation she shattered that window and pulled the baby out of the car seat. And she did it just in the nick of time, the car exploded literally seconds later I guess she still carries her military training."   
Alec froze, his eyes were wide, unblinking. It was as if he was looking at something only he could see. "Izzy, h-how is Izzy?"   
"Isabelle will be fine. She wasn't even hurt." He reassured.    
Alec crossed his arms over his chest, his body was visibly trembling. His breathing was picking up and his eyes glazed over. 

Magnus knew what was happening. Flashback.    
"I'm so sorry, please look at me!" Magnus pleaded, hating that he had triggered his boyfriend.    
The other man's eyes were so distant. "I once watched an entire family die. They were in a car trying to flee the shooting. P-people were dying all around me.” His voice cracked, “B-but I remember that family. When the bomb went off everything happened in slow motion. When I looked at the car I could see a little girl looking back at me. She was begging me to save her."   
Magnus teared up, putting his arms around Alec, holding him tight. "I need you to focus on my voice. It's not real, it's not real. None of it is real. You’re with me. You’re safe. You're home."   
"Why do human beings do such horrible things to one another?" The tall man asked the sky as if he needed God to answer.    
Magnus lowered Alec to his knees, he could feel Alec’s tears as he rocked him in his arms. "You are safe. You are home. You made it home. There are no bodies. There are no bombs, no bullets, no pain, and suffering. You and me, your strength and my love, that is what's real."   
The paramedic closed his eyes, focusing on holding his fiance. Alec had been in combat for eight months before his injury. After the first time Magnus had witnessed one of Alec’s episodes, he asked him to talk it out, to tell him the stories. Magnus wanted to be his outlet so he would never feel like he had to shoulder the burden of his memories alone. Magnus wanted to know what Alec was seeing, so he could find a way to help. He talked to Magnus about the bombs exploding, children screaming as their parents were gunned down in front of them. He even told Magnus about the sniper who shot him in the shoulder with an armour piercing round. Unfortunately, there were many recollections buried deep, or simply too horrific to put into words.   
Slowly but surely Magnus began to feel Alec's arms around him. "I-I'm sorry.”

“Do not apologise for something that isn’t your fault, darling.” He helped Alec to his feet, "Let's sit on the sofa. Let me hold you for a while."   


"No.” 

“W-what?”    
Alec grabbed a nearby plate shattering it against the wall. "I said,  _ ‘No’ _ !” He winced as he grabbed his shoulder. "Oh, God," he muttered. "I need my pain medicine."   
Magnus followed him to the bathroom. "Take off your shirt, let me take a look."   
"STAY AWAY FROM ME!" Alec slammed the door so hard, Magnus was scared that it would come off the hinges, “I DON’T WANT YOU TO SEE!” 

Magnus groaned in frustration, “Darling, Alexander, i know you don’t want me to see your body. B-but i miss seeing you. When we make love all you ever do is take out your dick! It’s like you don’t trust me enough to see your scars."   
Magnus could hear him sobbing, "Go away, Mags! You shouldn’t have to be with a man with such an ugly body.” 

“I love you, Alexander.” A tear fell down Magnus’ cheek, “I love all of you. Your scars. Your indents and all.” He paused, “... I even love your prosthetic leg.”    
Alec opened the door. His eyes narrowed as he stared me down. "Get- out."   
"No."   
Mag-”    
"I love you."  Alec covered his face with his hand, tears fell from his eyes. Magnus’ heart was breaking. "I'm sorry I always bring it up. But… But i want you to trust me.”    
“I do trust you.” Alec cradled the other man's face in his hands, “I do.”    
They kiss as if they are promising one another something no words could express.    
“Let’s go to bed.” Magnus suggested, “Relax a little.” 

 

They entered the bedroom.    
Magnus crept into bed next to Alec, taking in the scent of his hair. He smelled like a mixture of sweat and sandalwood. "Where's the weighted blanket I bought for you?"   
"It's under the bed."   
Cataina said weighted blankets work by stimulating pressure points, helping those with anxiety, insomnia, autism and PTSD. Magnus brought it for Alec after a particularly bad episode a few months after Alec’s injury. As he covered Alec with the blanket, Alec snuggled into it.    
"Are you comfortable?" he asked.   
Alec nodded.   
Magnus spooned Alec's large back, he moved his hands under his lover's shirt. Alec's breathing was beginning to stabilise. 

As a paramedic, Magnus knew what he was feeling: surgical scars, skin grafts. Some scars were so thick it was clear his body had been nearly torn apart. "Are you in pain?"   
"Physically no. Everything is healed, it's just I look like something out of a horror movie."   
“I love you, Alexander.” 

Alec’s breath hitched when Magnus’ hands wondered lower, “I love you too.”    
Magnus undid Alec’s belt, opening his jeans and reached in. Through his underwear Magnus could his massive bulge. His lover wanted him just as badly as he wanted him.   
"I'm going to take my clothes off," Magnus said, removing his hands from his lover’s body. "If you want to stay under the blanket you can stay under the blanket. I'm not going to force you to do anything you don't want to do."

Magnus peeled off his shirt keeping his back to him. After removing his pants Magnus laid on his stomach completely nude and Immediately felt the warmth of Alec’s palm as it moved over the back of his thighs and over his ass.   
"I love you, Mags.'' Alec said, removing his own shirt while still under the blanket, tossing it to the floor. He paused for a moment, pulling the blanket close.   
"I love you too. If you want we can have sex under the blanket."   
"No," Alec closed his eyes as he removed the blanket. "I can't keep living my life like this”

Alec was gorgeous. 

Magnus marvelled at the skin he hasn’t seen in so long. Pale strong chest that was covered in dark hair, a stomach lined with god-like abs with a happy trail that Magnus wanted to trace with his tongue.    
Magnus put his lips to the beautiful skin, gliding his tongue to the scar from where the bullet that tore through his shoulder. He gave it a soft kiss. Alec moaned, hands reaching for his jeans to take them off.   
"Let me," Magnus whispered, massaging him through his briefs before pulling down both of the layers. Sighing lovingly as he wrapped his lips around his nine-inch cock. 

Alec's left leg had been amputated just above his knee and Magnus drew back to take in the plastic leg.

Alec whispered, "A rocket-propelled grenade hit a building behind me…."   
"We don't have to talk about it." The last thing Magnus wanted was for him to have another episode, especially in his current state of undress.   
"I trust you.” He took a breath, “The building collapsed, my body was crushed under the rubble. I woke up in a hospital bed and my leg was gone," he said with a genuine smile.   
“You’re amazing.” Magnus smiled back, then glanced back at the leg, “This is going to sound strange but… Can I take off your leg?"    
Alec chuckled at that, "I would actually like that. You know that sensation; pins and needles- like when your foot goes numb."   
"You feel that in your prosthetic leg?"   
"All the fucking time- I know it's all in my head. Maybe if I see myself without my leg, in the presence of someone I trust, my messed up brain will take the hint."   
Slowly, Magnus released the clamps that held Alec's prostheses in place. When the leg was removed Alec took a deep breath. The way his body was reacting was akin to someone stretching after a workout. "You're the first person to see me without my leg… well, instead of the doctors that actually removed it."   
“I feel honoured.” He replied, licking Alec's thigh the same way he would his cock, kissing and sucking on the scar tissue of his stump. Magnus could feel his muscles tense. 

Then Magnus went in with his mouth, sucking the cock with all he had. Hand on each thigh. Alec gripped the sheets as his fiance took his entire length down his throat.   
"I want you," Alec moaned as Magnus walked his fingers down the scars on his amputated thigh. “God, i have missed you.” His hands gripped Magnus’ hair, pushing him forward. Magnus moaned around him, looking up. 

Alec took the lube from the nightstand, coating his fingers, “Come here.” 

Magnus sat up, saddling the thighs of his ex-soldier.

Alec carefully sunk one finger into Magnus, hearing him inhaling sharply when he began to thrust. The motion was easy, made smooth and slick due to the lube, and it wasn’t long before Alec began to speed up, circling his finger to stretch his lover a little more before thrusting in and out. 

“A-Alexander.” He moaned quietly, his walls being rubbed up against in the best possible way. And Alec eyed him hungrily, watching Magnus’ face grow red in pleasure.

Alec added a second finger, stretching him, and scissored them. The digits changed course, practically poking around in there, searching, until he pressed against a bundle of nerves and Magnus’ back arched at the sensation. 

“ _ Fuck _ !” He gasped, “Y-yes!” 

“By the angel, you are so stunning,” Alec breathed, and Magnus’ head lolled back with pleasure at the sound. Alec smirked, and reached out his free hand to tease the tip of his fiance's cock. “Wow, you’re dripping already. Want me that bad?” 

“I want you! I want you so bad!” Magnus kissed him, babbling against his lips, “I missed you. I missed you.” 

“Sh, baby.” Alec calmed him, “Won't be long until you get what you need.” 

Magnus felt himself trembling. “H-how much longer?” He panted. 

“Soon. Just be patient, honey.” Alec cooed. Magnus mewled upon hearing that, nodding frantically before thrusting his ass back on Alec’s fingers. But Alec pulled them out just as Magnus got into rhythm, making the smaller man huff in annoyance. 

Leaving sweet kisses on Magnus’ mouth, he shifted to line the swollen head of his cock up to Magnus’ stretched hole. Magnus kissed him furiously, sinking down in one fluid movement.

The sudden fullness forced a gasp out of him. The sensation felt mind-shattering, and Magnus was out of breath just from the one movement. 

A low groan came from Alec as he savoured the pull of his boyfriend’s muscles around his cock. He would never get used to how tight and hot he was, the way he clenched when he was desperate, the noises he made when he was stuffed full.

“Holy  _ fuck _ ,” Magnus moaned, resting his forehead on Alec’s shoulder, “You’re s-so  _ big _ , I...I’ve never been so _ full _ , holy–oh–holy shit. A-Alexander.” He tensed his thighs, adjusting himself again so that the next  thrust hits his prostate straight on. When Magnus did bounce again, he let out a strangled cry. “Oh,  _ Alec _ ! ”

“Does that feel good, baby?” Alec groaned out, the pure heat of Magnus washing over him, made him sweat and tremble with pleasure. “Tell me, baby. Do you like riding me?”

“Yes!  _ Oh! _ Fuck!  **_Alexander!_ ** ” Magnus panted, continuing to bounce on Alec’s lap. He knew his thighs would be infinitely sore, but it was so worth it. Magnus bent forward and stole a quick, harsh kiss.

“Ale- _ Alexander _ !” His voice breaks on a moan as Alec’s cock hits his prostate again.

Alec starts fucking up into Magnus, thrusting into him hard.

“ _ YES _ !” Magnus yelled, “Ah! Ah!  _ AH _ !”

He can’t do anything but sit there and take Alec’s cock; the slapping of their skins starts to sting.

The soldier only slows down when he feels Magnus clench around him. 

Alec kisses him filthily, fucking into him deep and bites Magnus’ bottom lip causing him to stutter his hips.Every time Magnus’ ass slapped against his lover’s thighs, Alec growled at the pornographic noise.

Sweat drips down Magnus’ face, a blush has taken over his cheeks and neck, and his swollen lips are parted. Alec’s hands settle on Magnus’ ass to knead the firm flesh and to help him move. Both getting close to orgasm. 

Magnus bends down to bury his face in Alec’s neck, his thighs burning. 

“I’m close, Alexander.”

“Me too.”

After a few more hard thrusts, Magnus’ trembling legs close around Alec’s hips and his hole clenched around his cock and he finally comes. His body thrashing against Alec as it hits him like a wave. He screams and grabs his fiance's shoulders tightly as he convulsed in pleasure. 

Alec holds him close to his body as best as he can while chasing his own orgasm. It doesn’t take him long until his rhythm becomes erratic and he feels his balls tighten. He fucks Magnus into over-sensitivity until his orgasm comes crashing in all at once. 

Alec buries his cock deep inside Magnus as he comes into him. He sees black as he groans loudly, his hold on Magnus getting too tight to be comfortable. He thrusts hard and slow some more to ride it out. 

Magnus became completely lax above him and lets the soldier use his body.

“Fuck.” Magnus breathed. 

Alec chuckled, “‘Fuck’ indeed.” 

  
They laid there in ecstasy, Alec’s limp cock still deep in Magnus’ ass. They cuddled into one another and Alec was no longer ashamed of his missing leg due to Magnus’ great  **_convincing_ ** . 

"You know, Alexander, you were the reason why I became a paramedic." Magnus moved his mouth to his lover’s. They kissed passionately with Magnus’ hand cupping Alec’s cheek. They pull away and Magnus whispered, "I could never compete to your level of courage. Of bravery."   
Alec stroked Magnus’ face, “All the while i was out there… being brave… i just wanted to go home. Go back to you. I love you, Magnus.”  

“I love you too, Alexander.” They kissed again and when Magnus pulled away to breath, he muttered to Alec’s lips, “I’m so glad you’re home.” 

Alec sighed, going into kiss the love of his life again, “I’m home.” 

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Leave A Comment :3
> 
> Also Tell Me Opinions, Suggestions and Prompts :3


End file.
